Sewing to Summer: May Projects and a Confession

First, the confessions-

Hi, I am Michele and I am a sewing failure.
Or maybe, Hi, I am Michele and I am a sewing wannabe!

Either way, you get the point.  Once again, my little fingers have been busy doing just about everything BUT sewing.

Ashton's little fingers, on the other hand, have been busy once again.

Good thing, or else this would be a really boring post!

She has been hired by one of the local dry cleaners and is doing alterations almost daily!!  She loves every minute of it.

The embroidery project finally became a shirt -

She made a shirt for her sister -

See?  Ashton - yay!  Momma - Fail!

Blessings,

Too Many Books?

Some sweet friends asked me last week how to organize and declutter the books.  Like I know.  haha


"Michele - do you have a blog post about purging books... I have a major book problem. Especially children's books. And with kids ages 9, 8, 5, and 2, nothing's really outgrown yet so I don't know what criteria to use to get rid of anything!"


Yep, it is hard.  Which is why you have not seen a post around here about it until now.  They kind of put me on the spot. ;)  It is also why I am going to turn this post over to my wise daughter in a moment and let her guide you.  She is a minimalist, remember - but she LOVES books and could have books problem like the rest of us if she was not very careful.  She also guilts shames helps me hold my book problem to only a minor problem.  Mostly.

Before she gets you all straightened out let me say this -

I love books.  Biographies, fiction, children's books, antique books, it doesn't really matter.  In the past I have not been too picky.  Now I am trying to be more so.  I also do own an iPad on which I download books to read.  Many of them are still sitting there to read because I forget about them.  It is a concept that I embrace, but not one I am real good at implementing.  Yet.  I am trying.  We also are trying to utilize the library more.  Don't get me wrong, we have always loved libraries.  But in the past we have just added those books to the dozens a month we bought.  Now we are trying to let the library buy the books and just borrow them instead.   Keep in mind, that I also have kids in four very distinct age groups so I understand that problem.  I am also a military wife and we move.  Often.  And my husband is sure that most of our weight is in books.  He may be right.  SO that being said - here's Ashton!

As mom mentioned, I am pretty minimalistic in many ways, but my biggest weakness is books.  I love books. I actually own a NOOK and have the NOOK and Kindle apps on my phone but still, I have this need to hold a real book.  I have, however, been thinking about ways to cut back on books. It started when we moved and almost all of my books were packed up in boxes and then re-packed in tubs because there simply isn't space in my room for them. So I've been without most of my books for almost a year now. And while I have missed many of my books, but there are others that I had forgotten I had. Clearly those need to go.

If you go through your books, you will probably find you own different books for different reasons. The first step is to decide why you own a book. Is it because...
1. You love it - This is a great reason to keep a book. If you plan to read it over and over again, by all means, keep it.
2. It is helpful/a frequently used reference book - If you garden, keep the gardening books you use the most. But if you never garden, don't keep books on gardening.  With the internet, you might be able to do without owning a dictionary, or more than one dictionary.  Do you use that book often enough to warrant keeping it, or it is good enough that you can check it out at the library?
3. Someone gave it to you - Sometimes this is a good reason to keep a book. Most of the time it is not. If it was a gift and you are never going to read it or you didn't love it, pass it on to someone who will read it and love it. And let us all pledge to stop giving coffee table-type books as gifts. Thank you.
4. It makes you look intelligent - This is not a good reason to keep a book. You are going to look downright un-intelligent when you have to confess that you haven't actually read War and Peace, but you keep it on a prominent shelf to make people think you have read it.
5. You might need it someday - How likely is it that you are really going to need that book on...whatever obscure topic? Give it to the library and you can borrow it if you do end up needing it.
6. You needed it...once - But do you need it now? Yes, you needed that text book in college, but do you need it or reference it now?

If you are overwhelmed, start with a shelf. Pull out a book. Do you love it? Yes? Great, put it back on a shelf. No? Ok, so why do you own it? If you haven't read it, do you honestly plan to? If you have read it but don't like it, why are you holding on to it?
Bottom line, if you wouldn't read it or reference it again, don't keep it. It is pretty much that simple (or not).

Antiques. I love antiques, and I used to own a lot of antique books. But I realized that they were a problem, for several reasons. First of all, few of them were books I would actually read. Second, few of them were in good enough condition to actually be read. Third, I have serious allergies, and dust and mildew and mold create huge problems for me. Guess what old books usually contain? Right. So now I don't keep an antique book unless it is a book I actually want to read (and love) and it is actually readable. (I now only own the Bible Dictionary in the picture up there.) It does you no good to have an antique Dick and Jane if it is falling apart and you can't let your kids actually hold it and read it. Let a museum or library or decorator have it (and antique books usually sell pretty well).

Collecting. I hereby confess to owning every one of the 50 original Nancy Drew books. But I am absolutely head-over-heels in love with them. They are special because some of them were mom's, others I found and family found for me, and I just love reading them. I am a total Nancy Drew nerd. And before they were packed away, I read them all the time (they are the perfect length to read during lunch, just saying). So if you love a series, keep them. But don't keep a series if you don't love it or just to keep it. And books are meant to be read, not looked at. Oh, and no multiple editions. Trust me, you can only read one copy at a time.

Children's books can be harder, but there are ways to manage them.

1. Only keep books your children like (within reason). Don't hold onto books just because you like them, especially if your children do not like them. Of course, there will be exceptions to this one.
2. Stick to favorites and classics. When choosing which books to keep for the next child or even their children, stick to the favorites and classics. Choose books that mean something and skip the Tonka truck and Barbie books (unless those are the ones that mean something to you). Also, skip the ones you can easily find at the library.
3. Be careful with "classics." Ok, I am about to tell you a dark secret. Many books that are considered "classics" are actually terrible books. There. I said it. Don't keep a book because it is a classic, keep it because it is good. This goes for any "classic" book.
Example. I can't stand The Scarlet Letter. (Please don't come after me.) I know there is great symbolism, history, etc. etc. etc. in that book, but I thought it was terrible. So I don't own a copy. If I ever hit my head really hard on something and want to read it again, it is easily found at the library and is not taking up space on my shelf in the meantime.
4. Focus on books for all ages. I am always amazed at what little ones pick up by just listening. And while it is great to have books at their level for them to enjoy, they are also capable of listening to and enjoying many books meant for older kids. They may not catch every detail, but someday they will.

I am sure there are more ideas that I'll think of later, so this post might have a part 2, but I am not promising anything...And while my books are packed away right now, I will definitely be donating a bunch when I unpack them someday soon!
What did I miss? Are there tips you would add? Do you hoard books like mom? =)
   -Ashton

Linking up with the Frugal Homeschool Family Link up and Loving the Weekend Blog Hop!

The Hill You Die On - Guest post from Ashton

The other day I was talking minor points of theology with a friend.  He mentioned a belief he has and then said, "But that's not a hill I'm willing to die on."  I had never heard anyone say that so it stuck with me.

Then, I saw a friend's post on Facebook. It was a good post - deep, personal, and moving.  But someone else had commented and absolutely murdered the person over a detail that wasn't even particularly relevant to the post.  It made me angry, and I pondered why someone would think that kind of angry, venomous response was appropriate.  They made a mountain out of a non-existent mole-hill.

Later, I was doing some class work and came across some very opinionated statements that I disagreed with, most strongly.  So I dashed off (more like deliberated over) a very thoughtful and carefully written post that would set the record straight and, simultaneously, show the professor where I stood and how clever I was. (Ha.)  But before I posted it I showed it to mom, who essentially told me I was making a mountain out of a mole-hill.  So I decided to wait and post it when I was less...passionate about it.  But waiting to post the response didn't stop me from thinking about it.  And suddenly everything hit me.  Was I just trying to make a point?  Did I just want to prove I was right?  Did I want to sound like the person on Facebook, blasting someone out of the water for a trivial detail?  Did this really matter?  Was this a hill I was willing to die on?

Now, I would venture to guess that we all come across things we disagree with or dislike.  We may even come across things that make our blood boil.  And in response, we don our armor and rush into battle.  I know I am guilty, and you probably are, too.

So allow me to humbly suggest a few things.

1. When you feel yourself disagreeing or getting angry, ask yourself, "Is this a hill I am willing to die on?"  Is what you are upset about such a big deal in the eternal scheme of things?  Are you literally, I mean literally, willing to die over that issue?

2. Don't assume they meant it like you took it.  The written word can be hard to accurately interpret.

3. If it is a hill you are willing to die on, is it something you would say to that person in person, out loud, while looking them in the eyes?  If it is, then you should probably say it to that person in person, out loud, while looking them in the eyes, not on Facebook or on a blog.

4. If you must say it, make sure it conforms to 1 Peter 3:15, "But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect" (NIV, emphasis mine)

I don't know about you, but I can't think of all that many hills I am willing to die on.  I realized that the issue I had written the post about to my professor wasn't one of them.  So the next time you dash off a snarky, I mean, well written and thoughtful post or comment, stop and ask yourself, "Is this a hill I'm willing to die on?"

                   

College - Been There Done That

Mom’s post last week might have taken you by surprise.  And clearly, someone found it interesting because almost 1,600 people have read it. And many commented that they could not wait to read my post. Which is a lot of pressure. Thanks everyone. Here goes.

Coming home was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make and honestly, I’m still working through some things, mostly my own feelings and expectations. Some days I feel like shouting for joy and some days I think “what have I done, I have passed the point of no return and I'm defying gravity.” (Incorporating the musicals Les Mis, Phantom of the Opera and Wicked into my melodramatic lament.)


I do want to thank you for your kind comments on mom’s post.  I was not sure what to expect and had braced myself for some harsh, unkind words. Reading all of your sweet comments on the blog and Facebook made me cry – not one person had anything negative to say (and if you did, thank you for keeping it to yourself). I was blessed by your stories.

There were a lot of factors that played in my decision, and all of them rolled around my head for weeks.
Where did God want me? What did my parents want me to do? What did I want to do? I had friends and a job that I loved.  I didn’t want to be “giving up,” and I didn’t want others to think I was giving up.  I felt that either way I chose, I could not win. (more Phantom lines. Go figure) Either way, I had to give something up.

But, I came home. Because this is where my family is and, for now, this is where God wants me.
So you might be wondering what I’m doing now.

And you might be thinking that I am going to sit around doing nothing. Which is tempting. Actually it isn’t. I can’t sit around doing nothing for very long before I have to go organize something, or at least knit something. So I have plans. In case you were concerned.

On Monday, I started four online classes at Arlington Baptist College. By taking online classes, I’m able to save money both on room and board and living expenses. I also might get to graduate a semester early, which would be a huge blessing. And I’m starting up my sewing business again, doing things like hemming pants, planning/working on three quilts, draping a formal dress, sewing on patches for my dad and brother, etc. This week my sister and I are in charge of food – planning, shopping on a budget, and cooking.  (mom's idea, I think it was a trick!)  I’m working on my photography and my web design/HTML skills. I’m also working on making some friends here, and getting involved with my church.

So I am busy. And very happy to be home. But it is an adjustment. This week and next week will be the hardest because my friends are back in school and I started classes. It is a little painful to see them post about being back, but at the same time, I am so glad I do not have to leave home!

I want to leave you with two things.

The first is that I just want you to know that those of us who are/were homeschooled can succeed at college. In fact, the homeschooled kids I met at college were the students who were excelling. Not only did they excel at school, they excelled at other things, like sewing, flying planes, playing instruments, conversing with adults, public speaking, etc. There are those who might take my story as a story of failure. I want you to know that it is not - as far as my parents and I are concerned, mine is a success story, not one of failure.

Second, my favorite quote. “Never say never, when God is writing your story.” –Steve Saint
I keep coming back to that quote because God keeps doing things in my life that I looked at and said “never.” Don’t say “never” to God. Let Him write your story. It works much better that way.

Blessings, Ashton

If you have any questions, please leave a comment and I would be happy to try to answer them. 

Happy to be linking up with these wonderful women-  visit their sites and be blessed!

Fun Friday- My First Born

Our first born. A pretty special girl.  Perfectionist, devoted, loving.  The child who cooks, cleans, encourages us to be healthier and encourages us to seek God with all our hearts.  Not the easiest toddler, but the easiest teen!  And now a college student excelling in all she does.  Yep, she is pretty special!

Where were you born?
First, I do not deserve the words mom wrote about me. Second, I was born in M-i-s-s-i-s-s-i-p-p-i.

What do you like about being the first born?
I had to think about this one.  I always wanted an older brother. =) I guess the opportunity to invest in my sibling and others.

How do you feel about your siblings getting to do things you were not allowed to do?  Go on,  just get it out of your system now! ;)
I think...I feel a wee bit...aggravated.  And yet, sorry for them.  For example, I was not allowed to watch the tv show "Arther" or drink soft drinks.  Colby does both.  (note from mom- He only does so on special occasions out, girlie!)  Poor child, corroding his mind...

What is your pet peeve?
Living in a dorm has revealed that I have more pet peeves then I had previously realized. (rest assured, I keep them to myself).  I think my biggest pet peeve is when people leave the sink a mess after using it.  Because then I feel compelled to clean it.

What is one of your favorite family memories?
I have no idea.  Seriously.  I guess any time the whole family is together, laughing and having fun.

Lest you think she is always serious! ;)
She is a pretty good nerf shot!

What is your favorite book besides the Bible?  And yes, just one!
The Hiding Place, by Corrie ten Boom.  Hands down.  Every time I read it I am convicted of something new, or struck by an aspect of God's grace that I never considered.

What do you look for in a friend?
I do not know know that I look for friends, God seems to bring them to me and say "This one is for you."  But I find that my truest and closest friends are the ones who challenge me, seek the Lord and encourage me to do the same.  They aren't perfect, and neither am I.  We go through ups and downs, but my true friends love me anyway.  (And most of them
have a pretty good sense of humor.)

What is your favorite scripture?
That is not a good question, mom.  I do not have a favorite verse, it is impossible to choose. 

What led you to a Christian college?
God.  And I felt that it would be foolish of me, when offered the opportunity to spend several years learning about the Lord from professors who know Him personally and are committed to teaching truth, to turn it down. Where else can I acquire such a knowledge of the things of God and deepen my relationship with Him?  Not at a secular university.

What surprised you most about college?
The sheer amount of stress it causes me.  I know not everyone feels that way about college, but it stresses me out.  Sure I have fun sometimes, but mostly I am stressed.  Just my personality and need for excellence.  Needless to say, God and I chat about that often.

What do you miss most since going away?  Other than your amazing mom, of course.
The interaction with my family, and being understood.  It is always sad when I quote movie lines and no one quotes the appropriate line back (shout out to my Riley, who is amazing).  I did choose to go to a fabulous college that is slightly more conservative than I am, so I miss my music. =)

Give me three words to describe yourself.  Just three, please.
Christian.  Pioneer.  Ashton.

Anything else you want to tell us?  Now's  your chance...
I encourage you to seek the Lord, and to be open to His leading in your life.  My relationship with Him is the single most important thing in my life.  Do you have a relationship with Him?  If not, mom or I would love to talk to you about it.

I have been told that I am being too wordy, so I will stop now. =)
 -Ashton, or αστον  (my name in Koine ((Biblical)) Greek. Greek may or may not have((ok, it did)) contributed to the stress I talked about up there.)

Pop on over to read about our second princess!

College Transition - Hers, not ours!

Having successfully made it through a semester of college, mom asked me to share some things, mainly what I have learned.  So here goes.

1. The first week is the hardest.  If you can make it through the first week, you can make it.  Trust me.

2. Take pictures of things you want to remember on your phone.  Seriously, this works for anyone, not just college students.  eg. I have no idea when the library is open, but I do have a picture of the hours in my phone.

3. Sometimes you have to find a "paper place" (Or a reading place.  Or a devotion time place).  I cannot write long papers in my room, even when it is quiet.  Just doesn't work.  I'm not sure why.  But sitting in my dorm lobby, at that table (see it down there, with all my paper writing essentials (junk) on it?), there I could write papers.  (I think I took this picture in the throes of writing a very long counseling paper.  Note the earplugs and gum wrapper, both essential items for sure.)

4. Speaking of papers, parents - please make sure your child is familiar with the basic paper formats such as (but not limited to) (linked for your viewing convenience) (Don't you just love parenthesis?)  MLA, APA, Chicago(Turabian), etc.  Prospective college students, try to figure out what paper style your college or department uses, and practice writing in it.  That just didn't occur to me so I only learned to write in MLA.  Well, the Bible department at my school uses Turabian, not MLA.  Guess who had to learn to write in Turabian?  Right, me.  Trust me, it is much easier to learn a paper style before you use it rather than as you attempt to use it.  (Hey! Hey, Turabian is cool because you use footnotes.  And footnotes take up room.  So a six page paper becomes more like a 4 page paper once you have footnotes. Just sayin.)

5. Keep your stuff clean.  This applies to everyone, but especially college students and siblings who share rooms.  Makes life easier.  And cleaner.  You don't have to be a minimalist (not that I am or anything -cough- sarcasm) but get rid of what you don't like/don't want/don't use/don't wear.  (Just don't get rid of what your roommate doesn't like/doesn't want/doesn't use/doesn't wear.  I can't see that going over too well.)  Hang up your clothes.  Put your shoes in a basket or one pile.  Stack papers, gather up your books, and make your bed.

See, isn't that clean looking? -->

Just kidding, that was my closet before I put my stuff in it. =) 

6. As tempting as it is to go out and buy twenty million coordinating (did you know that word used to be spelled and pronounced "co-ordinating"? Seriously, we now say it like there is a W in there but it used to be two separate sounds. Sorry, bunny trail there.) Anyway, don't buy twenty million co-ordinating items for your dorm room.  Use what you have and, if you can, wait to get to college and then make a run to the store with the large blue sign.  There is no need to have a bath mat if your roommate has one.  Same things applies to an iron, curtains, lamps, Etcetera, Etcetera, Etcetera.  (name that movie)

7. Be creative.  I have a top bunk, and consequently, no bed side table.  So, he who shall not be named (my dad) suggested I hang a shower caddy on the wall.  It works perfectly!  It holds my Bible, chapstick and odd accouterments perfectly.  'Tis cool.  I thought I had a picture...but I don't.  So you will have to take my word for it.

 

Imagine a cool picture of my bedside thing here. 

8. Take time.  I took both of the photos below on two different days while walking back to my dorm.  Are they gorgeous photos?  Nope.  They are from my phone.  But they were things I noticed when I slowed down for a minute and looked around.  Otherwise I would have missed a gorgeous sunset and how the light perfectly outlined the tree.

9. Sit in the front in classes, and preferably slightly to the right or left.  If you sit in the front you can see and hear better and the professor will be more familiar with you and thus more willing to help you out if you need it.  Sit to the side so you have a diagonal view and can see the professor and white board/screen, instead of staring at the person's head in front of you.

10. I miss my family.  Still.  But that is ok.  Missing means loving!  And while I love college and have fun and learn while I am there, I would still rather be home.  And that is ok too.  (This is where I would insert a fancy, out of context verse about home or something, but I don't have one.  Sorry.  Feel free to insert your favorite verse here.)

11. There isn't an 11, I just wanted you to thank you all for praying for me and for reading my mom's fabulous blog! =)
             Blessings, ALP

College Transition- Ours, not hers!

For 18 years you nurture a child, teach them, guide them and impart much wisdom, or so we hope.  Then you send them off into the world!

Whose grand idea was that anyways?  And why did I fall for it? ;)

Just kidding!  Mostly.

We are home after a 7 day whirlwind trip off dropping our oldest off.  There were many sweet memories made and now tired parents and siblings!  And an 18 year old as well, probably.

I may decide to write more later, but for now, here are some things learned...

You get use to having someone around and it is just plain weird when they are not.  Remember, we are a homeschooling family, so I am not even use to her being gone all day.

No matter how much stuff you take, you will still end up in Walmart with all the other families dropping off their kids.  CP said we did our part at boosting the economy.

Wisconsin is not close!  AT ALL!

Small schools are amazing!  We each unloaded ONE thing from our car...a group of amazing girls unloaded all the other stuff!  We should have brought those girls home to help catch up on the laundry!

Christian schools are amazing!  To see people praying all over campus, to have people ask how they can pray for your child...'nuff said!

God is in the small stuff!  Like giving ALP  only two roommates.  One is from a ranch in WY, one is a fellow military brat.  My child is in heaven! 

Prayers from friends WORK!  I know, because otherwise it would have been a much longer ride home!  And I thank you!

Grandparents are not to be taken for granted!  They kept the boys for a week, loving on them and entertaining them more than we would have!  Many thanks!

My 14 year old is a great little sis and a real trooper!  She helped with everything and was our official photographer!

My husband is amazing!  He drove the whole way there and back with no help from me, and pretends not to see the occasional tears.

My oldest is ready for this challenge.  She surprises me hourly with her strength, determination and devotion to the Lord.

She is where she belongs and this momma could not be more proud.

Guest post from ALP- Christian Romance and Why I Gave it Up

Guest post from my 18 year old daughter.  Enjoy!

“Christian” Romance and Why I Gave it Up

(All Scripture taken from the KJV)

Note: This post is not meant to be judgmental, nor do I desire to call anyone out. This is simply something that I have dealt with in my life and that I see many girls and ladies dealing with. Comments (even those that disagree) are encouraged and welcomed, however, as Ephesians 4:29 says, “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.”

I like to read. A lot.  In fact, I have often gotten in trouble for reading when I was supposed to be doing something such as school or even eating or sleeping.  And contrary to what you might expect, especially coming from someone who personally owns over 400 books (I know, I know, I have issues), selecting a book to read can be a challenge.  Sometimes books masquerade as good Christian books but really are not.  I have found Christen Romance books to be a prime example.

                Now, is there a verse in the Bible that specifically forbids reading Christian romance?  No. However, there are some verses that pertain to it. Song of Songs 8:4 says: “I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, until he please.”  When we (girls and even married ladies alike) read romance of any sort it can stir up feeling in us that we might not have had otherwise.  The written word is powerful!  Song of Songs exhorts us to not awaken love until the right time.  Proverbs 4:23 says “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”  A different translation says “guard your heart.”  Unfortunately, by awakening love before God’s appointed time we aren't keeping or guarding our hearts, but opening them up to things we may not be ready to be exposed to.  Finally, Philippians 4:7-8 says “And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”  I am not saying that all Christian romance novels are impure, but if they are causing us to be impure or to think impure thoughts then they are not things that God calls us to think on or have anything to do with.  It is also easy to let our minds wander from reality; comparing ourselves to girls in books and being deceived by unrealistic scenarios.

If we were to be honest with ourselves we would find that most supposedly “Christian” romance novels are just romance novels that use implications instead of explicitness or have a main character that goes to church and/or is Amish.

 I have found that the “Christian” romances that I once read did not draw me closer to God or point me to Christ, but took up time that could have been spent in much more profitable ways. They also gave me unrealistic expectations and ideas of both men and marriage.  Christian or not, most men do not ride up on white horses or even catch girls’ eyes from across the room.  Good relationships are built through time and God’s leading.  That can be tough to hear!  Trust me, I have read my share of Amish and Christian romance.  It was tough for me to hear this message from someone several years ago, and even tougher to admit that I had wasted so much time reading junk that I had justified as “Christian.”  As the Lord worked in my heart I began to see what I had been reading in a new light.

Guarding our hearts requires more than just not reading the obvious steamy romances;  it requires full submission to God and the willingness to give up things for Him.  We have a saying in our family; She who is most defensive or offended is probably the most convicted.  I know it is true because it often applies to me.  So before you get defensive and prove that you are convicted, =) I would encourage you to take a good, long look at what you are reading and why you are reading it, and let God work in your heart.

Blessings, ALP

Sisters

I always wanted a sister.  Someone to play dress up with, someone to whisper secrets to, someone to go through life with.  That desire, unfortunately, never was fulfilled so I was thrilled when my second child was born.  Our second girl.  SISTERS!

ALP- 4 yrs., RNP- new!  ;)

ALP- 12 yrs, RNP -9yrs

They will hate me, but this was just too hard to resist!  Joining daddy in Mustache March!

See what happens in 6 years.....

18 and 14 years old!

I have heard many girls talk about their sisters in not so nice ways.  I never quite got it.  My girls love each other dearly, they truly are best friends.  Yes, they may have quarreled some as little girls, but at the end of the day they were best friends again.  They never had another option, really.  We encouraged it and we accepted no less.  In our house the rule is you treat the people you love, the family God gave us, better than anyone else.  "If you cannot be nice to your sister, or brothers, how can we trust you to be kind to others outside this house?  You need to practice here at home some more."  (I am all about practicing at home!)

And so my girls have someone to dress up with, someone to whisper secrets to, and someone to go through life with- and sometimes, I even get to be a part of it!

If you have kiddos struggling to get along with each other one of the books I highly recommend is Making Brothers and Sisters Best Friends by Sarah, Stephen, and Grace Mally.  Raise the bar in your home and watch as they reach for it!

Guest post from ALP- The Gymnast

Note from the momma- We have often been asked how we feel about sports and specifically why we allowed our oldest to walk away from the life of a gymnast.  Here is part one of the story- from ALP.  Please know our hearts- we are not judging.  We are just sharing our familys' experience.  We must each choose what is best for our lives, with the Lord's guidance.

I started gymnastics early. Some of my earliest memories are of doing gymnastics about 13 years ago when I was about 5 years old. When I was 8 I, (with my family’s support and encouragement) took my hobby to the next level. Enter competitive gymnastics. A few years later, at the height of my gymnastics “career” I lived a gymnastics centered life. Just to give you an idea of what that can look like, I’ll lead you through what my typical day was, at only Levels 5 and 6. After waking up I would put on a leotard, throw on a shirt and pair of pants and put my hair in a pony tail. Then, after eating breakfast I would get as much school done as possible, eat something small, and get my gym bag. Mom would then drive me to the gym where I stretched, conditioned, practiced, and sweated for three hours. (And when I say sweated, I mean it, as we lived in Alabama for a while!)Then mom or dad would pick me up. When we got home I would shower, eat again, (Usually a hot pocket. Or two…) and finish whatever school I still had left. After that I usually had an hour or so of free time before dinner, which was closely followed by bed. Then the day started all over again. I failed to mention that I did this five days a week. Weekends usually found me in the gym again for extra practices and weekends with Gymnastics meets found us on the road for the entire day, if not the weekend. During this time I had a team of Russian husband and wife coaches who were incredible. They barely spoke English, had been gymnasts themselves and were legends (although I did not find that out until recently); having coached in four countries. (Rita actually choreographed the opening ceremony of the 1988 Olympics and Vladimir trained Olympic gold medalist Vladimir Novkov as well as Valeri Liukin. Yes, that Valeri Liukin, Olympic gold medalist Nastia Liukin’s father. Exactly.) Anyway, that was where I was coming from. When I was twelve, we moved again and I started at a new gym, the only gym within several hours of us. Almost immediately things did not go well. In other words, they did not go as I planned them. Suffice it to say, after a few months I began to see that something had to change. After conversation after conversation with my parents, crying hour after hour, and praying “Why, God?!?”, I made the decision to give up gymnastics. I felt like I was throwing away my life, not to mention all the money and hours my parents and I had put into Gymnastics.

 I can honestly tell you that it was the hardest decision that I have made in my 18 year life. It broke my heart. I spent the next week (month, really. Sorry, mom!) crying and began to go through withdrawal. Let me tell you that if you go through withdrawal when you give up something, you have been a slave to it. I would think about gymnastics most of the day and dream about gymnastics just about every night, as if my body said “Fine, I can’t do Gymnastics I will re-live it”. I had terrible growing pains in my legs and arms, so bad that we finally went to see the doctor about it. As the months and then years went on it got better, but I still dream about gymnastics about once or twice a month, even now, six years later. The difference is that now I see God’s plan. My entire life had been Gymnastics. Gymnastics was what I did, and a Gymnast was who I was. My entire identity was wrapped up Gymnastics, and when that was taken away so was my identity. As Shawn Johnson, a former Olympic gymnast who just had to retire from a knee injury recently said, “It's hard to accept that the one thing you had your entire life is no longer there.” I think that quote sums it up perfectly. I was a slave to Gymnastics. I now see that while God was a big part of my life, He was not my life, not my identity. God desired my heart so much that He took away what I had placed before Him. Losing Gymnastics and, consequently, myself, forced me to change my identity to one that was in God, and to trust His plan. Looking back now I see that I would not be where I am today If I was still a gymnast.

 I have often been asked the question, “If given the chance, would you do it over again?” The answer is no. While I do not regret doing what I loved for years and I certainly do not blame my parents for anything, if given the choice to do my life over again I would not do gymnastics. (Or at the very least would not compete in the sport.) Besides giving God the leftovers in my life, there were other strong negatives; such as learning to respect my coaches more than my parents, and spending more time away from home than in it. Looking back, the negatives far outweighed the positives and it was not worth having my heart broken in the end.

Today you probably wouldn’t know from looking at me that I was a gymnast (besides the fact that I stand and sit with my shoulders rolled forward, a combination of years at the gym and sitting at a piano). Most of my flexibility is gone and I certainly don’t have six pack abs anymore. =)  However, certain things haven’t gone away. I can still do a headstand, back bend, and the worm both forwards and backwards. I can over-extend my knees and tell you the skills and connections in my last bar and floor routines. Just don’t necessarily ask me to do any of that in public. =) Honestly though, all of that will eventually pass away, and all I will have is what is most important; eternity with the Lord. I couldn’t see His plan then, but I can now. God is the center of my life, and I am so thankful that He broke my heart, only to fix it with Him at the center.  -A

Stay tuned for Part Two- The Dancer on Monday!

Homemade Laundry Detergent

Hello! I'm the oldest daughter, ALP, and mom asked me to guest post today while she is in surgery. So here we go. =)

The topic of today's post: Home-made Laundry Detergent. 

Let's face it; Laundry detergent is not only expensive but also contains harsh chemicals, artificial fragrances (code for more chemicals), and dyes. A few years ago I started exploring websites and blogs, looking for an easy laundry detergent recipe. It had to meet the following criteria:
1. It had to be easy. (Mom was not totally on board with this yet so complicated recipes were going to be a no-go.)
2. It had to be a powdered recipe. (see number 1. Mom was not going to go for a huge 5-gallon bucket of slime sitting on the laundry room floor. I also didn't like the idea of having to melt soap like so many of the recipes called for)
3. It had to work in a high-efficiency washer.
4. It had to be cost effective. (a tough thing to live up to, as mom was ((and is)) a coupon queen and got laundry detergent at great prices)
5. It had to work. (obviously)
 After some experimentation I have come up with this recipe, which is very close to this recipe.

You will need:

One 4oz. (or close) bar of natural soap. Any will do, such as Kirk's Castile (pictured here), Dr. Bronner's, or Kiss My Face, which can be found in the laundry aisle or in the organic/natural section of your grocery store. Ivory soap can used in a pinch but does contain fragrances. 

Fels Naptha, although recommended by many, contains harsh ingredients and comes with an eye and skin irritant warning - not something I want to use to wash my clothes! If you are looking for a soap to use, read the label and look for something that has only a few ingredients, ones you recognize! Kirk's Castile does list fragrance as an ingredient, but it is that last thing listed and will not make your clothes smell. It is sort of the least of all evils, if you will. =)

 Washing Soda, found in the laundry aisle in a Yellow box.

 Baking Soda (usually cheaper if bought in the baking aisle or the dollar store!),

 and Borax, found in a white box in the laundry aisle. 

Please do not be afraid to make your own laundry soap, it is super easy!

 First, grate (or have your children or siblings or husband grate) the 4 oz. bar of soap with a cheese grater. (oh, and please be sure to wash it after you are done. thank you.)

 You want the flakes to be fairly small, not huge soap shavings.

 See?

You can sort of mash them up if they are too big.

 Next, add 2 cups of Borax,

then add 1 cup of Washing Soda,

and 1 cup of baking soda.

Mix well, stop to take a picture. ;)

Now, this is where you can get fancy and add 2-3 drops of an essential oil to make your clothes smell nice. I have yet to do that. But please feel free. 

Put your laundry detergent in a container. Mine happens to be a vintage glass jar that came from an falling down house on a family farm but a plastic dollar store container works just as well. =) 

 

 You can also make a fancy tag, if you are so inclined. And you are done!

To use: just add 1-2 tablespoons per load. Now, if you are like me, you will want to add a cup. After all, (in my mind) regular laundry detergent works that way and if 2 Tbs. is good a cup will be better, right? Wrong. Regular laundry detergent is watered down so it is cheaper to produce and so you have to use, and therefore buy, more. This detergent is not watered down at all so you do not need nearly as much of it. 1TBS for regular loads and 2 TBS for heavy or super dirty loads like towels or gym clothes. Trust me.  Much more will not get rinsed out, leaving soapy residue on your clothes.

Now for the details.
1. It is safe for top-loading, front-loading, regular, and high efficiency machines.
2. It will not foam and bubble like store bought detergent. This is normal, and makes it safe for HE machines. Trust me, it is still working.
3. It will not make your clothes smell like a forest, spring meadow or rainbow. The smell that we have come to associate with clean is actually a toxic combo of chemicals. Please realize that until you get used to the lack of "clean smell" (aka pink cherry blossoms or lavender dream) you might think the clothes don't smell clean. They are clean, and I promise that you will get use to it. You can, however, add a few drops of an essential oil of your choice if you would like your clothes to smell like something.
4. It makes about 90 loads worth of detergent. Our family of six does a minimum of 9 loads of laundry a week. That means I only make more detergent about every three months, and it only takes 10 minutes to do. (Ok, more if you photograph it.)
5. Cost break-down. I figured it out at one point but I'm not sure where it went (maybe it got washed...). Suffice it to say that we are still using it, so it must have been cheaper than what mom was paying for detergent even using coupons. =)

There you go! Easy, cheap, and natural laundry detergent.

Please continue to keep mom in your prayers and we will keep you up to date with how she is doing!
 Blessings, ALP