Is Your Dad a Pirate- Book Review and Giveaway

I am a sucker for a man in uniform.  After all, I have been married to one for 25 years.  Some send their husbands off with a kiss to an office.  I send mine away with a kiss and a prayer, often to secret locations around the world.  And while none of us are promised tomorrow, it seems the life of the military are even a bit more precarious and uncertain.

Just ask the many spouses and families of wounded or killed service men and women.  The numbers are staggering.

Those number make a book like Is Your Dad a Pirate? even more precious and needed in today's world!

Is Your Dad a Pirate?, written by Tara McClary Reeves, is a 32 page hard back book that explores how one family handles the curiosity of strangers when the man of the house returns home from battle wounded.  Taken from the life experience of Tara when her father was wounded as a Marine Corp Lieutenant, this book will touch you and open your eyes to the life of the military family.

You will also probably need to grad a tissue, just be forewarned.

Told from a young child's perspective, one can feel the pride she feels for her father, as well as the fear she felt when he went away to fight.  It talks of prayers and feelings of excitement of a future reunion.  It also talks of the fear and anguish of a phone call telling of an injury.

But Is Your Dad a Pirate tells mostly of the courage of a family.

Of the response to the question- "How did you lose your eye and arm?"

And the mom's answer- "He gave them in service to our country."

Don't you love it?!  A sweet and simple answer to an honest question from a child.  No ugliness, no embarrassment, no judgment.  But a lesson to both the child of the man injured and to the child who asked the question.  Later when the question was asked again, it was the dad's own child who answered, and you will love her answer even more!

I am honored to have this beautifully illustrated book on my bookshelf.  It reminds us of the heroes who fight for our freedom every day and of the families that support them daily.  It is a reminder to us all that the freedom we enjoy often comes with a price.

Oh that we would continue to teach our children and our children's children about that price and the special people behind it!

I have an extra copy of Is Your Dad a Pirate to bless one of my readers with!  Just leave me a comment here on the blog and a random winner will be chosen next Friday!

Blessings,

On Veteran's Day

I was born into the military. Well, I was born to a military father and his beautiful wife, a strong military spouse. Either way you put it, I'm a military brat. Or, for those who think "brat" is a negative word, I'm a military kid. I grew up with the smell of jet fuel -- playing and eating at events in helicopter hangers, and staying perfectly still and quiet during countless ceremonies. I've sat in and pretended to fly more helicopters and planes and jets than I can count, but I've never been up in a military one. I've moved 13 times (soon to be 14 times) in 21 years, and I've loved it. 

Moving was an adventure. Military life was an adventure. It wasn't until I got older that I saw the other side of the military. The side that is less parade grounds and air shows and Star Spangled Banners and more difficulty and separation and loss. Lots of loss. I remember realizing that moving and leaving friends made people sad, and wondering why I didn't feel that sadness. I remember when my dad's best friend was killed in action overseas, and seeing dad's sorrow and the sorrow of a widow left behind with a tiny son to raise alone. And then, years later, seeing the man's name on the Air Force Academy Chapel wall, and feeling the weight of every other name there, too. I realized why my great-grandfather didn't talk about serving in WWII and that the statement about war written on the young soldier's helmet in the famous Vietnam war photo is true, and no one wants to re-live war. I realized that dads and moms could be ordered to far off places without their loved ones, serving for 6 or 8 or 12 months, and I lived the reality of that horrible separation, three times. I realized why the National Anthem makes women and even old, stern and stoic men cry, because it makes me cry now, too. Anything remotely patriotic makes me tear up, and I apologize if you happen to be standing beside me when it happens. 

Most of all, I realized that they are right, freedom really isn't free. All freedom has a terrible price, and the price is life. The lives of those who live the military life, and their spouses and children and loved ones, and the lives of those who were called to make the ultimate sacrifice. And it's the same with freedom in Jesus Christ. We are free because he paid the price for us. He gave his life as a ransom for many and was the most ultimate sacrifice. But even in the face of this truth about freedom, I can't say that I despise the life I've lived and continue to live. 

Instead, I'm deeply grateful for it -- for being part of something bigger than myself, for the lessons I've learned, for the pride in my country and my father, a man who lives with integrity first, service before self, and excellence in all he does. For the men and women who gave and give their lives, dying to themselves on a daily basis. But most importantly, I'm thankful for a Savior who gave His life. Because it is His sacrifice that makes this fleeting life worth living and gives me a hope of a better life to come. And for that, I am most thankful.

  -Ashton

Lessons From a TLF

TLF

That's military speak from Temporary Lodging Facility.  And our home away from home for the past week.  It's one of the perks of this crazy lifestyle of ours and one we have used frequently.

For those of you who are not familiar with them, TLF is a hotel suite minus the fancy amenities.  Not every one is created equal, but this one does have a few separate rooms and a small kitchen, enabling us to spread out a little and not eat in restaurants for a week straight.  It's the little things, folks, trust me!

The Lessons Learned

Little spaces gather clutter faster.
   How DID we get this all in the car in the first place?

Suitcases expand the minute you leave your house and you can never repack them the way you originally had them.
   Shopping while on vacation may not be the smartest idea I ever had.  Just saying.

At home we underestimate our dependency on our laundry room.
   When I get home I am going to tell my washer and dryer how much I appreciate them, just in case.

People on base are friendly.

• At the food court a gentleman engaged my 13 year old in a conversation about his life plans like he was his own flesh and blood.  And it did not freak the said 13 year old out at all!

• After leaving the food court I asked the kids if they needed to go potty before starting our 15 minute walk back to TLF. (They love when I do that in public, by the way!)  Immediately the woman in front of us turned and asked if we would like a ride back instead, saying she had plenty of room in her SUV.  We needed the exercise after several rainy days inside, but let me say that if we had not, I would not have hesitated to take her up on the offer.

Base Housekeepers are hard workers.  And still smile and call you sweetie!

   They also come way too early in the morning, but I am learning to forgive them.

Ants can take over any kitchen,  Even one on the second floor.  Exterminators are hard workers too!
   What is with those little ants and why do they haunt me every time I step foot in the South?

Reveille comes earlier than you think.

   No, my sweet 7 year old, that is not your cue to wake us all up!

Retreat still makes your heart swell with pride.
   And yes, it is amazing to see cars come to a stop and people, young and old, saluting a flag as it is taken down at the end of each day.

Taps still can make our hearts swell with pride.
   Yes, my son, that does mean it is time for YOU to go to bed!

We are blessed with friends we have made through the years!
  Like the family that we have only met only one other time but whose husband was once deployed with mine in a land far away who invited us for dinner and yet we laughed like lifelong friends! And we now want to be stationed with them! ;)

Displaced families bond quickly.
   When you are displaced and living out of a suitcase you just tend to have a certain look about you.  

Our family loves a challenge and an adventure.
   And we are more than thankful for this unexpected one!

It's time to head home.

Blessings,

X is for X-tra X-tra, read ALL about it!- Deployment Time!

Yep, there is big news in our family, but it is not the news I wanted to have to share.  Actually, it is not the news I wanted at all.  But no one asked my opinion.  Imagine that! ;)

On Tuesday of last week the military "invited" CP to a 365 day deployment.  Or retire by February.  Because of the timing of the news, the reality was he had about 48 hours to decide and his actual retirement would have only been weeks away, not months.  For reasons too numerous to list, he is accepting the assignment.  Because of additional training needed, he leaves at the end of the month.  (yeah, so much for 365)  Just for the record, it is a "great" job for him and a huge honor.  Please know that I am not trying to diminish that at all.  He signed on the dotted line 22 years ago and is proud to serve his country.  But choosing between your country and your family is a choice that no person should or wants to have to make.

I have struggled with whether to share this or not with my readers, but in the end it came down to this- I said a while back what you see is what you get on this blog and it would be pretty hard for me to keep that kind of secret for a year.  It would not be fair to me.  And I am not sure it would be fair to you.  Many of you have become very special friends to me and now I am reaching out to ask you for prayers for our family.  

We are going to need them.

• I have to figure out how to parent two boys alone for a while.  One of which has already suffered great loss in his life and one who is getting ready to turn 13.
• I have to figure out how to fill in for dad to a 16 year old that thinks he hung the moon.
• I have to figure out how to mentor a 20 year old alone through some pretty big things in her life.
• And on and on and on.

Which leads me to this-

• All of this may have taken us by surprise, but it did not take God by surprise.
• God is still in control, even when I feel like my world is spinning out of control.
• I am not alone.  There are military wives and single parents all over this world facing the same challenges.  They are not unique to me.
• I am blessed by friends and family that love us, and in a community that we adore.
• We are clinging to God's promises.
• We WILL get through this because of those promises!

I do not like it and I do not understand it, but I choose to trust God.

Does that mean every day will be easy?  No.

Does that mean there will be no tears?  No, not with 3 females in the house!

Does that mean there will be no whining?  Definitely no. ;)

But it does mean that we will move forward and do our best.

My husband asked us to do what would best glorify God in this situation.  I am not sure how it will look, quite honestly, but we are determined to try.

I saw this posted this week- (emphasis mine)

Look how Psalm 29 concludes – “May the Lord give strength to his people! May the Lord bless his people with peace!” God’s glory and power is not meant to scare us away. In fact, it’s meant to draw us near, strengthen our spirit, and calm our soul.

You see, the same God who has the power to control the storm is the same God who resides in your soul. When David wrote this Psalm, the Lord lived in the temple (v. 9), but today, our bodies are the temple in which the presence of God dwells (1 Corinthians 6:19).

In addition, if God has the ability to control the most powerful elements of nature, does he not have the ability to control the elements of your everyday life? The next time you experience a storm, let it remind you of the glory and power of God, and let it give strength and peace to your soul. (Paul David Tripp)

I love that!  That is my prayer.  It is going on my fridge, along with anything else that will encourage us through this year.  

These lyrics keep going through my head- (and yes, they are going on the fridge too!)

All that is within me cries
to you alone be glorified
Emmanuel- God with us.

My heart will sing a brand new song
The debt is paid, these chains are gone
Emmanuel- God with us

Such a tiny offering
compared to Calvary
Nevertheless We lay this at your feet!

-Mercy Me

God IS with us!

And you as well!

May He get the glory!

Blessings,

Homeschooling and the Military Family

"For the last 14 years we have been a homeschooling family. In that time alone we have lived in Florida, New Mexico, Colorado, Alabama, North Dakota, Wyoming and now Virginia. In 9 months we will be on the road again and yes, that is life in the military..."

To read my entire article, visit The Schoolhouse Review Crew site where I am spotlighted this week!

Scholarship Essay

A few months ago, I mentioned that ALP was up to her eyeballs in scholarship applications.  While she was not awarded the one that went with this essay, it was the one she was the happiest with and I wanted to share it with you.  I think it gives a small glimpse into the heart of a military child.  Names have been abbreviated to protect identities, but you military friends out there will probably recognize a few!

The question was if you could make a modern day Mt Rushmore, what four faces would you use?  (my paraphrase)

 

Faces of Sacrifice

Four faces. How to choose? Could we ever construct a 21st century Mount Rushmore big enough to hold the countless every day heroes who serve and have served in our military - some visible, some invisible? No, but two men and two women from my life could represent thousands from others’ lives.

The first face on the monument is Colonel D.O.C. (U.S. Air Force, Retired), a family friend and mentor, representing those who serve or have served in the military. They might sit at a desk as he did for twenty-plus years, fly a plane, or command a ship. Most are not recognized for their service. No one lauds their accomplishments or sees their names in the news. Yet, they continue to do their jobs, faithfully serving their nation with pride.

Mrs. Arlana J., her husband recently back from a six-month deployment, is the second face and represents the military spouses left behind - those who know what it is to be alone. They know the cold nights and the empty days. They have been left with children to rear, lawns to be mowed, and driveways to be shoveled. They remain silent when they hear civilian friends complain over two day in-country business trips. Through it all the military spouse stands strong for the one deployed on behalf of their country. They hold on, fight back the tears, and know the separation only makes the reunion sweeter, be it here or in heaven.

The third face is my dear friend Kirsten L., the daughter of an Air Force Colonel, representing military children everywhere including me. We identify planes or ships saying proudly “My daddy flies that.”, or “My mommy is on one of those.” We are easily identified as military children when asked our current address or telephone number. “It might be…no, wait. That was two assignments ago.” We are the teens who stand silently when the National Anthemis played, hands over our hearts and tears in our eyes. We military “brats” adjust quickly, know the right way to pack lampshades, and feel the solemn pride of a ceremony.

The last face on the monument, Major Steven Plumhoff, represents the fallen soldiers. Mr. Steve was my father’s best friend, killed in a helicopter crash in Afghanistan, leaving behind a wife and child. He represents the ones who, since the beginning of our nation’s history, have fought and have fallen, the ones who gave their lives so that we can live ours. They were men and women who showed great courage despite their fears. They are the ones who will always be remembered with pride and who are not just names on a cold, hard monument.

The monument gleams in the fading daylight. There are four distinct faces- faces that are tied together with a bond that spans time - the proud bond of sacrifice for their nation. Four faces you may not think you know. Yet I believe you do, for they represent countless others.